Monday, 22 August 2005

Effort

Internet goes full steam.

CV Pushers

All this Internet software needs to be programmed. So it looks like the second dot.com hype is happening. The market for IT contract jobs is steaming up and as a result IT agencies spring up like mushrooms. They scour the Internet looking for CV's, create indexes for keywords and expect to meet customer demands with minimal effort.

Most customers are very well able to browse the web themselves. So the CV pushers hardly have added value. Very often customers misuse them as book-keepers while labeling them "preferred supplier".

To keep the CV pushers at a distance, I removed my e-mail address from my CV. To further limit the stream of requests my CV is no longer downloadable as Word document. Yes, you can reach me if you really want, but you'll have to make an effort, be truly interested in me. Yet, the phone is hot at times, even I hardly ever do any contacting jobs myself anymore.

E-mail from Frans van Dooren, President of Onyx Finanz AG

Last week a classical example hit my in box, from somebody who obviously longs to surf along the new dot.com wave. The following short e-mail exchange is so beautiful. Please read and join the fun.
Date: Mon, 15 Aug 2005 14:54:59 +0200
To: HJ
Subject: Contact Henk Jan
From: frans-van-dooren@**n.at
Hello 

My name is Frans van Dooren and I am President of Onyx Finanz AG in
Switzerland. Onyx Finanz AG is an IT-Search company since 1989 and during this
time we found for our Candidates over 5000 new Projects or jobs.
We are specialists in SAP, Peoplesoft , Oracle,  Java and Websphere. For
several of our clients in Europe we are looking for a man/woman with your
experience.

If you are intrested please send us an updated resume in a word-file, your
wishes( do you want a contract or are you looking for a permanent  job as
employee), your availability and your thought's about the financial side.
My E-mail is: frans-van-dooren@**n.at


If you are not interested please also send us a small message.

I hope to hear from you soon 

Kind Regards 

Frans van Dooren
President of Onyx Finanz AG in Oberwil ( Near Basel) Switzerland

Remote address: 80.121.119.235
Remote host: m1984p011.adsl.highway.telekom.at
User agent: Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows NT 5.1)

Well, my dear mister president Frans van Dooren, a bit of free advice:

  1. Make an effort.
    IT specialists with more than 20 years of experience are few and far between. So, when trying to reach somebody like me, you'll really have to work for your money.
  2. Pay sufficient attention to your typing, especially when reusing the same message over and over again.
    • The space between Peoplesoft and the comma should not be there.
    • A opening parenthesis should be preceded by a space, but not followed by one.
    • One space suffices between words.
    • A comma after Hello would have been nice.
    • Use capitals only at the start of sentences and names.
    • Finish all sentences with a period.
  3. Make sure your message is of personal interest to the reader.
    The description a man/woman with your expertise is hollow, meaningless. It looks like a standard phrase used in many of your messages. What kind of expertise are you looking for? Each of the terms SAP, Peoplesoft, Oracle, Java and Websphere is quite wide and thus meaningless. Using them so lightly does strengthen the impression you are just another keyword searcher, rather than somebody knowledgeable.

    It was quite easy for me to determine what you were really looking for, which path lead to my CV. Yet, show a bit of personal interest, tell me you used Google, even though your search arguments were not really good. When you click to CV's on result page 28 for "cv oracle dutch" it is very clear to me you are scouring the web. It even gives candidates the impression you are an collector of e-mail addresses, just like a malicious spam sender.

    Advice: Use the Inverted Pyramid approach. Get down to business at once, tell what you are looking for. Answer the who what where when questions immediately:

  4. Make sure people can get in touch with you.
So, Frans van Doorn, President van Onyx Finanz AG, your e-mail did not really got me enthusiastic for doing business with you.

CV pushers are always looking for many valid e-mail addresses.
Is this why you ask for a reply, even when people are not interested? Well, you did get your reply.

Answer to Frans van Doorn, President of Onyx Finanz AG

Date: Mon, 15 Aug 2005 16:53:26 +0200
To: frans-van-dooren@**n.at
Subject: http://www.google.com/search?q=+cv+oracle+dutch&hl=en&lr=&start=270&sa=N
From: SUMit - Henk Jan Nootenboom
Hello, My name is HJ and I am the owner of SUMit in the Netherlands. SUMit is an IT company, founded in 1997 and serves a wide range of international customers. Customers value SUMit's commitment in providing excellent shift roster expertise. My resume is available for download as PDF or Open Office document. My wishes, availability and thoughts about many things, including my hourly rate are available on the SUMit company web site. Browse a bit more, work for your money and think twice before ever sending impersonal emails again. HJ
Yes Frans, it was a bit mean of me to shamelessly copy your wonderful style of communication.

Famous last words of Frans van Doorn

From: "onyx finanz" <aon.912867123@**n.at>
To: SUMit - Henk Jan Nootenboom
Subject: Re: **SPAM** http://www.google.com/search?q=+cv+oracle+dutch&hl=en&lr=&start=270&sa=N
Date: Mon, 15 Aug 2005 21:49:13 +0200
Thank you for your reaction, but people with your mentality are of no use
what so ever.
Kind Regads 
Frans van Dooren
President of Onyx Finanz AG in Switzerland
I could not agree more. Marketese annoys readers.

Now the most funny part: You classify your own writing style as spam. What a brilliant self-knowledge and admirable self-mockery. Your last words got me rolling on the floor with laughter. Well done Frans, a classic indeed!

Wonderful, wonderful. This message originates from one of the greater minds on our globe.

It radiates so much class that I fail to comprehend its full meaning.

And all of this at ten to ten at night. President Frans van Doorn truly has his heart in the work.
He approaches his business relations with a combination of unknown enthusiasm and personal charm.
There is no limit to his efforts.
Kudos!

Till next nut,
Nut